Question 718

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O Allah, send abundant prayers and peace upon Muhammad and the family of Muhammad, the Imams and the Mahdis. In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds. Peace, mercy, and blessings of Allah be upon you. My matter is very private and urgent, and I implore you to present it to the Imam, because I have left the creed of people who do not believe. There is no solution except from my Imam Ahmed (a), because he is the guardian of my affair and has greater authority over me than I have over myself-to my oppressed Imam, the successor of his father, our hearts’ beloved until our final breath, Ahmed Alhasan, granted victory by Allah, Muhammad, Ali, and the Imams. I do not know where to begin, but I hope the situation reaches you exactly as it is. My problem is with my husband, the father of my daughter. For seven months I have lived with my family because I disagreed with him. He does not spend the night at home, does not care about me or his child, and has relationships with other women whom he converses with online. The important point is that our problems are many, all because he is distant from me and from the home and is preoccupied. As he says, he has his own life and work. He did not want us to have children because he speaks of divorce every day and with every problem, however trivial. Sometimes I feel that he has begun inventing problems with me, especially recently. Allah willed that we be blessed with a daughter, now one and a half years old, who lives with me. He insists upon divorce, and he has no reason except that we were not compatible, I do not suit him, and I create problems. Because I know that divorce is the most detested of lawful things before Allah, I tried greatly with him. My family tried with him so that we might return and live lovingly in Allah and forgiving one another, especially since we have a daughter, and since he is at fault-though I do not absolve myself, for the self certainly commands evil. He is a Husayni reciter, is very arrogant, and believes he is the best thing upon the face of the earth. I loved him with all my heart. Allah is my witness that he treated me well during the first months of our marriage, but after a year he changed greatly. Today, after five years of marriage, he has decided upon divorce. I have been very patient with him, his conduct, and his treatment of me, but he wants nothing except divorce. Before my family, his family, and many people, he said to me that I was divorced. They know he does not want to return after they tried to persuade him, so I agreed to the divorce as he wanted. But now he demands that I relinquish my rights, including the deferred dowry, and that I sign an agreement not to marry and to return the child to him if I do marry. He spent only a few months with her and has provided for neither me nor her throughout this seven-month period. If I do this, he will divorce me; if I do not accept his conditions concerning what are my rights, he will leave me suspended like this-neither married nor divorced. I do not think about marrying at all, but I do not want to sign anything. Given that he divorced me in court, I want to be divorced from him according to religious law. I live in Europe and go out to work, and I have needs outside the home; all this requires the husband’s permission. I remain his wife in name only, for he does not see me or ask about us. O my Imam, O Ahmed, I want a solution. How do I deal with those who resemble men? I want a divorce from him, to be free, and to devote myself to raising my daughter, attending to my religion, and your blessed call, because I am weary of problems and of those who do not fear Allah in anything. Can you divorce me from him, or do you, my master, have another solution? I adjure you by Allah that my message reach the Imam because my psychological state is poor, as is that of my family. I am a new supporter, and my family is about to join me, through Allah’s power and strength. Praise be to Allah, besides whom no one is praised for an affliction.

Source: The Enlightening Answer Across the Ether, Vol 7; Author: Imam Ahmed Al-Hasan; Question 718; Page Not available; AL-JAWAB-AL-MUNIR-V7-Q718. View Arabic source · Open the original Arabic source ↗

Accepted Answer

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds, and may Allah send abundant prayers and peace upon Muhammad and the family of Muhammad, the Imams and the Mahdis. If he divorced you before witnesses from your family and his family, and you had moved from the last period of purity in which he had intercourse with you to another period of purity, then you are divorced from him according to religious law. If you were living in your family’s home during your transition from the period of purity in which he had intercourse with you to another period of purity-that is, he was absent from you-then the divorce is valid in this situation even if you were menstruating at the time of the divorce. If you did not return to one another after this divorce until the divorce waiting period ended, then you are now divorced. He has no right over you, and you deal with him like any other man who is not a close unmarriageable relative. Even the divorce in court is valid if he divorced you in the presence of witnesses while you were in a period of purity in which he had not had intercourse with you. As for his demand that you relinquish your rights despite his being the one who divorced you, this is false and illegitimate conduct. He has no right to demand that you relinquish your religious rights. Custody of the child is your religious right if her father does not believe in the truth, and he has no right to demand that you relinquish it. If no religious divorce occurred according to the preceding conditions I explained to you and which are set forth in The Laws of Islam, and you want a judgment divorcing you from him, you can deliver this answer or its meaning to him and ask him to send a message to the website within one month from the date you notify him, explaining his position just as you did. A judgment requires hearing both disputants. May Allah grant you success and direct your steps aright. If he neglects to respond within thirty days, you can thereafter send a message requesting divorce from him, if you were not in fact previously divorced from him. In the message write your full name and his full name. Allah willing, a religious divorce certificate will then be sent to you.

Question 718 - The Enlightening Answer Across the Ether, Vol 7

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Question 718

Ahmed al-Hasan Response:

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